Blog Entry 1: The Art of Being

Gee, where do I start? Well…I’m 41, about to reach my 42nd year of life, and I’m still chasing my dream. 

     My dream has actually changed shape many times throughout my 41 years of life, but one thing remains the same: I still want to perform. I still want to sing. I still want to write. These are all the things that most of us in this age bracket probably used to do but now had to set it all aside because of our careers. You move on. I noticed I would go through moments of depression during times when I set my performing bug aside, so I had to do something about it. I had to address the monster head on. I needed to find an outlet, a space for me to express myself, my art. As a nurse, expressing myself isn’t part of my daily routine work. In fact it’s the opposite of expressing myself; I’m often trying to get my patients to express THEMSELVES so I can adjust their care plan to tailor their immediate needs. There was a time, though, when I felt the need to express myself to my patient - he was in hospice, and I wanted to tell him in the most profound way that I am there for him and that his whole care team is there for him, and he is loved. How would I do this? Well - I sang to him. I sang Sam Smith’s “Lay Me Down” at the bedside in the hospital with his wife next to him. We shed tears. I will never forget this day. I was so honored to have been invited to his funeral to sing the same song for the congregation.

     It's in moments like these when I feel joy and a sense of purpose. A sense of who I am. A baker wouldn't just bake the batter and call it a cake without making their signature icing. It's the icing that puts their personal touch, it's what makes the cake. I am moved by moments when humanity is revealed, when people witness an event or experience that makes them feel. I want to provide that to people. I'm a nurse, yes, and that’s a humble, rewarding profession. But it's how I serve or care that's more important. 

We all have an art of being. What is that art for you?